Welcome to the worst About Page on the internet

I hate these pages so much.

I hate reading them. I hate writing them.

The only reason I read about pages is to try to find a way to make my about page less miserable. And I still haven’t found what I’m looking for.

Let’s throw the rules out the window. I’m going to give you the obligatory paragraph about me because, well, it’s obligatory. Then I’m going to talk about the Matrix (yes, the movie) and, finally, I will pull back the curtain a little.

If you read my articles, you see me preaching about missions and values, about authenticity, about alignment. So I’m going to share all of my for-internal-use-only marketing notes.

  • Vision
  • Mission
  • Brand voice
  • Brand values
  • Brand position

I want you to see what it looks like. I want you to see that I’m trying to practice what I preach. And, if I do it well, it will help you connect the dots.

Obligatory About Me

Josh Robbs provides strategic and tactical consulting and services regarding website design, development, and operations. He focuses on delivering simple, no-nonsense solutions and strategies that will give you the ability to share your organization’s story efficiently and effectively.

Can you believe I took a $200 course to develop that? Maybe you like it. It does say what I do and who I help. 

But despite its potential clarity and effectiveness, it feels soulless and sterile. I loathe it.

Do you like movies? I do. Let’s talk about the Matrix instead.

Welcome to the Matrix

I hope you’ve seen the movie. This will make a lot more sense if you have.

You’re Neo, the story’s hero.

This story is about you.

It’s about you and a challenge you’re facing.

You know that the way things are isn’t good enough. You know there’s more. You know that there’s a better way. You just don’t know what it is.

Right now, your marketing and website are somewhere between horrible and not good enough. It’s time to do more. It’s time to do better. There will be a cost. But what’s the alternative?

If you’re lucky, the alternative is slow growth. If you’re unlucky, the alternative is a slow death for your business.

At least, you don’t have Agent Smith* trying to kill you.

I’m Morpheus, Neo’s guide and trainer. I have the knowledge, experience, and technology that you need.

This is where your story differs from the movie. In the movie, it was Morpheus who had the vision. It was his mission, but only Neo could make it a reality.

In this story – your story – you have the grand vision. And I’m here to help. 

Are you ready to find out what help is available? (Unfortunately, I can’t download the skills right into your brain.)

* Actually you have your own personal Agent Smith called the Resistance. But that’s another story.

We're off to see the Wizard

In The Wizard of Oz, there’s a key scene where we find out that the big, green, floating head of the Wizard is actually just a projection and that the “real wizard” is just a guy. Toto, the dog, finds him hiding behind a curtain working a wall of controls. The “wizard” is a fraud. (There. The two of you who haven’t seen The Wizard of Oz should be all caught up.)

The wizard (full name:  Oscar Zoroaster Phadrig Isaac Norman Henkle Emmannuel Ambroise Diggs) is a fraud because he used his awesome machine to lie. He’s a genius. He built that machine. But instead of presenting himself, he created a completely false persona and pretended it was him.

That’s bad branding. This is the exact reason so many people, maybe even you, hate branding and branding exercises. You want to be the Wizard and are afraid to be the guy behind the curtain. You end up with a brand that feels fake. Because of that, all of your marketing feels slimy.

A good brand emphasizes relevant traits that you truly have. 

So here I am, pulling back the curtain. Here’s a peek at my definitions of my brand – the aspects of me that I’ve either chosen to emphasize in this project or the aspects that I can’t shake no matter what I’m doing.

I want you to look these 5 blocks and try to see how I’ve included them throughout the site. And if you can’t find them, email me and we can discuss it. And if you find me going against my descriptors or values, be sure to let me know.

Contact Josh


I dream of a world without crappy, hard-to-use websites.


Rid the world of crappy business websites by providing training, coaching, and consulting to small organizations so they can connect with their customers online. (That’s where they’ll find the $$$.)

Brand Position

Josh Robbs provides website consulting for busy business owners in a helpful environment with a no-nonsense voice helping them feel confident and be ready to market their business.

Brand Descriptors

In no particular order:

Down to earth

Brand Values

No fluff
No assumptions
No bullshit
No hypocrisy